Juggle These Flares

A Texas State trooper pulled a car over on I-35 about 2 miles south of Georgetown Texas. When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Austin Texas to do a show for the Shrine Circus. He didn’t want to be late.


The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and asked that if the driver would do a little juggling for him then he wouldn’t give him a ticket. The driver told the trooper he had sent his equipment ahead and didn’t have anything to juggle.

The trooper said he had some flares in the trunk and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said he could, so the trooper got 5 flares, lit them and handed them to him.

While the man was juggling, a truck pulling a horse trailer stopped behind the State Troopers car. A cowboy from central Texas got out, watched the performance, then went over to the Trooper’s car, opened the rear door and got in. The trooper observed him and went over to the State car, opened the door asking the cowboy what he thought he was doing.

The completely sober cowboy replied, “You might as well take my ass to jail, cause there ain’t no way I can pass that test.”

Texas Leads the Way

Of the 1,800 active oil wells in the United States, nearly 50% are currently located in Texas. Of all energy produced in the United States, nearly 41% originates in Texas. If Texas were an independent nation, it would be the 9th largest oil producing country. It’s not all rainbows and unicorns in Texas, but if these animals did exist, they would live happily in the Republic of Texas.

In 2008, oil production on federal lands accounted for nearly 36% of all domestic production with about 1.7 million barrels produced. In 2013, the amount of oil produced on federal lands is static – with no new permits issued by those currently in control – with 1.65 million barrels produced on federal land. Due to the huge increase in production on non-federal land (specifically in Texas) federal proportion of domestic production has fallen below 20%. Oil production on non-federal land increased from 3.5 million barrels in 2008, to nearly 7.8 million barrels in 2013. At the same time, air quality in Texas is nearly 25% better due to better monitoring and new technology.

Whoever is elected the next Governor of Texas should be dedicated to keeping the balance between energy production and a clean environment. Whoever is elected the next President of the United States must dedicate themselves to following the leadership of Texas.

If the United States is to be energy independent, it will take more than feel good politics of emotion and subjective feelings based on false promises, feigned pretense, and faked numbers by unscientific findings with a political agenda. Science should guide our decisions, and reason should be our standard.